The Secret of a Happy Marriage

A couple had only been married for two weeks. The husband, although very much in love, couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies.

So, he said to his new wife, "Honey, I'll be right back."

Where are you going, Coochy Coo?" asked the wife.

"I'm going to the bar, Pretty Face. I'm going to have a beer."

The wife said, "You want a beer, my love?" She opened the door to the refrigerator and showed him 25 different kinds of beer, brands from 12 different countries: Germany, Holland, Japan, India, etc.

The husband didn't know what to do, and the only thing that he could think of saying was, "Yes, Lollipop.... but at the bar...you know... they have frozen glasses... "

He didn't get to finish the sentence, because the wife interrupted him by saying, "You want a frozen glass, Puppy Face?" She took a huge beer mug out of the freezer, so frozen that she was getting chills just holding it.

The husband, looking a bit pale, said, "Yes, Tootsie Roll, but at the bar they have those hors d'oeuvres that are really delicious...I won't be long. I'll be right back. I promise...OK?"

"You want hors d'oeuvres, Poochie Pooh?" She opened the oven and took out 5 dishes of different hors d'oeuvres: chicken wings, pigs in blankets, mushroom caps, mini pizzas, and pork strips.

"But my sweet honey...at the bar....you know, there's swearing, dirty words and all that..."

"You want dirty words, Cutie Pie?

"LISTEN UP DICKHEAD! SIT DOWN, SHUT THE HELL UP, DRINK YOUR DAMN BEER IN YOUR DAMN FROZEN MUG AND EAT YOUR FRICKING HORS D'OEUVRES BECAUSE YOUR MARRIED ASS ISN'T GOING TO A FRICKING BAR! THAT SHIT IS OVER...GOT IT, ASSHOLE?"

.....and, they lived happily ever after.

Isn't that a sweet story?

I am amazed at how so many people are (majorly) over-protective of Kelly. I am in love with him. I want to spend the rest of my life with him. I do not want to hurt him. I also know that he is a man, that has stood on his own two feet for years. Yes, he is legally blind and a loner, but he has over-come that and has been on his own as a productive adult. He needs his space. He needs to be treated as a man. I wish that I could fix his eyesight (more than I can express in words), but I can't. No one can. He is the most wonderful man I have ever met. He has taught me so much about computers, personal strength, love, tolerance, and life. I tried to protect him by driving him to and from work everyday. One day he finally told me he just wanted and needed to take the bus. I understood with out asking why. I always complain that it took us 11 years to get together, but I understand that we needed the life experiences we have been through. My family and friends are just as over-protective of me. I have been through alot, too. However, I have always been able to get back on feet and even raise a child while doing it. I am an adult, even though I the size of a child. (My two-year old is over half my size.) Kelly and I both have weaknesses and strengths. What one lacks, the other covers. I am grateful that so many people care so dearly about Kelly. I am, also, grateful for those that care about me. I am more than grateful for those that love and care about Elisabeta. I believe that everyone deserves to experience great love and caring. Plus do not feel that I am putting anyone down. I am not. I do not mean to offend anyone with this post. I am just expressing my amazement and gratitude. Thank you all for your love and caring. (No matter who it is meant for in this world. It is the greatest gift you give someone.)

my vampire name

(Under my maiden name)

The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity:
Constance Black

Known in some parts of the world as:
Bitch of Raven's Wings

The Great Archives Record:
A dark one, ancient, who flies free above all others.


(under my married name)

The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity:
Lirit Papillon

Known in some parts of the world as:
Hero of Raven's Wings

The Great Archives Record:
A dark one, ancient, who flies free above all others.


(Kelly's vampire name)

The Great Archives determine you to have gone by the identity:
Solomon Papillon

Known in some parts of the world as:
Anubis of The Storm Riders

The Great Archives Record:
The Riders come with the rain clouds, you will hear the thunder of their hooves in the sky.


Find out your vampire name here (only if you want to for fun)

lots of thinking

Hurricane Rita caused a lot of troule for everyone. Kelly & I have not been to back to the apartment since it hit, east of here. I don't think that anything has happened to it. Unless (knock on wood) someone broke in to it. I love Kelly so much...I did not even realize how much until all of this happened. I also realized why Adam and I always get on each others' nerves. We are too much alike. Are personalities are so much alike. (I am prettier though.) Are spouses are a lot alike too. We just have to understand that we are alot alike and work around it. Oh I forgot...today (around 16:00) we took Elle to her Cowpaw's (Ted's father.) All of he adults here needed a break, and so did Elle. She was restless and wanted to play. All four adults here were played out, after three sraight days of playing and her fits. We get her back tomorrow at 17:00.

Something I got today that hurt alot

Constructive criticism. We should talk about this. What do you think?



p.s. I have been meaning to talk to you about something. I don't feel
comfortable addressing it in front of Nat, so here goes.

You need to take a more active role in your outward relationship with
Nat. And I don't mean financial, or sexual or any of that crap I can't
see. I just mean in the part I can see.

When Laurie and I go out with you an Nat, you might as well not show
up. You just clam up and all I hear is endless discussions of Nat's
allegies or dolls or other things I have only a topical intrest in. I
don't mind that subject matter filtering in half the time, but when you
and her are together, that's all anyone can talk about BECAUSE YOU WONT
SAY A WORD!

I imagine the relationship is similar to the one that Laurie and I have
-- where I am Nat and you are Laurie (and that's not an insult, mind
you). I don't know how that applies to this complaint, but I thought
I'd throw it out there in an empathetic gesture.

Let me just retry to state my case a bit more bluntly. I want my friend
Kelly back. There. That pretty much sums it up. Right now my Kelly
fix comes via email and your blog (which is almost enough, mind you its
not like you and I have ever had a dialog heavy relationship).
Somewhere along the way of your pairing with Nat you have moved too much
in the background. Take a couple more steps towards the front of the
bus Kelly. Like I said on your blog: you are an interesting person.

p.p.s. I would worry that most people would read the above as a direct
attack on Nat, which it isn't. Its an attack on Kelly. But since you
are a fairly comprehensive reader, I'll assume you got that point. So
here is my Nat attack.

I am a critical person. It is what I am. I find fault in everyone and
everything. Nat can't take even the slightest hint of criticism. I
mean, she gets defensive even when I don't think I'm being critical. It
kind of stymies me. I'm afraid to open my mouth when she's around.

I want to be myself and grouse and complain and tease and jibe and all
the other stuff I do when someone doesn't take my opinion so seriously.
But I can't because Nat looks hurt whenever I say anything that she can
take slightly the wrong way. Get her to lighten up, will you?

p.p.p.s Ahhh, that felt good. And its not even Festivus yet.


Now I can tell you how this made me feel...but I will let everyone who reads this go by how they would feel getting this from their spouse. This was sent to Kelly from his best-friend.

another crazy quiz / test

The Liberated Lover 63% partner focus, 85% aggressiveness, 65% adventurousness

Based on the results of this test, it is highly likely that: You prefer your romance and love to wild and daring rather than typical or boring, you would rather pursue than be pursued and, when it comes to physical love, your satisfaction comes more from providing a wonderful time to your partner than simply seeking your own. This places you in the Lover Style of: The Liberated Lover. The Liberated Lover is a wonderful Lover Style, and forms the kind of free-thinking, sexually-exciting, self-confident lover that society once condemned but that a liberal-mind cherishes and exults. The Liberated Lover is a treasure to find, though it can sometimes be difficult to do so because they are often already engaged in relationships or are in high-demand if "in the market." In terms of physical love, the Liberated Lover is possibly the most thrilling and demanding of all, with the one potential drawback being that it is possible to feel 'overmatched' at times by their prowess and selfless giving. Given trust and understanding, and the right lover, the Liberated Lover can be a delight in bed. Best Compatibility can probably be found with: The Exotic Lover (most of all) or the Carnal Lover, or the Suave Lover. Congratulations! If you enjoyed this test, I would love the feedback! Thanks Again! -- THE LOVER STYLE PROFILE TEST

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 66% on partner focus You scored higher than 97% on aggressiveness You scored higher than 61% on adventurousness

Link: The Lover Style Profile Test written by donathos on OkCupid Free Online Dating

You scored 13 Intelligence, 16 Wisdom, and 16 Charisma!

All stats are based on the original D&D system of 3-18. 3 being tragically weak and 18 being olympic level ability. Odds are you will be more towards the middle for most things (the middle being 10-11), as that is where most people should be. If you scored above 18 in any skill, I highly suggest you go back and read the directions closer. Especially if you scored above an 18 intelligence, you need to take the test over and only answer ONCE on the first page. Taken properly, it is not possible to get above an 18 on any stat, unless you' over 70 years old. Get the other half of your stats at this companion test. I am open to suggestions for improving this test. Please message me if you think I am not taking something into account, or have any questions for how I calculated scores.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 16% on Intelligence You scored higher than 79% on Wisdom You scored higher than 91% on Charisma

Link: The D&D stats - Mental Test written by mojograham on Ok Cupid

Here are Adam's scores...(Kelly's best-friend)
I ended up with

STR: 12
INT: 14
WIS: 9
DEX: 14
CON: 12
CHA: 9

With the exception of STR=12, this is probably fairly accurate (my real STR <= 8).

-Adam

You scored 4 Strength, 12 Constitution, and 15 Dexterity!

All stats are based on the original D&D system of 3-18. 3 being tragically weak and 18 being olympic level ability. Odds are you will be more towards the middle for most things (the middle being 10-11), as that is where most people should be. If you scored above 18 in any skill, I highly suggest you go back and read the directions closer. Especially if you scored above an 18 strength, you need to take the test over and only answer ONCE on the first page. Taken properly, it is not possible to get above an 18 on any stat. Get the other half of your stats at this companion test. I am open to suggestions for improving this test. Please message me if you think I am not taking something into account, or have any questions for how I calculated scores.

My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender: You scored higher than 1% on Strength You scored higher than 35% on Constitution You scored higher than 75% on Dexterity

Link: The D&D stats - Physical Test written by mojograham on Ok Cupid

Life is not easy

Kelly and I were suppose to go to his friend's wedding on Saturday. We did not go. We did not go because we could not afford the trip this weekend and he wanted to clean up the apartment before my mom comes down. (My mom is staying with us the weekend of September 23 - 25, for the wedding rehearsal and bridal shower.) Since we did not go to Austin, I went to a friend's baby shower. She only lives twenty minutes away. She is a friend of mine from ten years ago and I really wanted to see her. We were not going to the wedding any way. But, some how I know that I will be blamed for us not going to the wedding. I asked Kelly over and over if he was sure that he did not want to go. He kept saying no, that we had too much to do and he was not originally invited to the wedding. He said that originally only family was invited to the wedding. I told Kelly that if we don't go to the wedding then we have to go to the party next weekend. We were invited to both. I will rant more about this later.
Now here is real reason I am on here now...the reason that I have not been able to sleep correctly for weeks.
Julie, she is one of my best-friends. She is my Matron-of-Honor. She is trying to take over my wedding. She is not planning my bridal shower, that is suppose to be in less than two weeks. She was originally going to have it at her house and it was going to be a pot-luck. Her house is in a small town an hour southwest of Houston. I know that just for me this would have been hard for me to do that day. I have to drive to Conroe to pick up my mom, on Friday. Sunday I have to drive Mom home. Monica, my biological mom, has to drive down from Plantersville. You can imagine everyone else has their drives too. Gas is at almost $3.00 a gallon. So I went to Double Dave's (here in Houston) and asked if they have parties there. They said that they can reserve a large area and it is free. Everyone just pays for their own buffet and drink. Everyone I have told about this likes the idea. It is centrally located, too. When I first found out about Double Dave's, I tried to get a hold of Julie and Ronni. Both of their phones were out that weekend. So I made an invitation for it, for an idea. I went ahead and gave a couple of these out to friends that I have ran into, that I don't have an address for. Julie does not like the idea of Double Dave's. She instead (now) wants to have it at the cafe where her husband is a manager. She says that this is because it is easier to give directions too and that it is free. Oh, she can decorate the little (I really do mean little) room however she wants to. The bridal shower is less than two weeks away. What the hell is she waiting for. It to pass by, before making up her mind and sending out the invitations. When I was on the phone with her (last night) talking about the shower, and various other things, she put down Kelly. She yelled at me for not giving her all the information about Double Dave's. And, she is suddenly changing the venue for the bridal shower. I already wanted to ask her to step down as Matron-of-honor (for all of the other shit she has said), but last night it took everything I have to not yell it at her. I know I need to be calm when I tell her. I have had so many people tell me that I should just kick her out of the wedding, but I just want her to step down to a bridesmaid. She has said so many things that have hurt me and Kelly, that I am having a hard time just talking to her. Half of the people in the wedding party want to kick her butt, for things she did to them. It is not easy trying to keep everyone else calmed down when she keeps saying and doing things to hurt me and Kelly. What is worse is that if I point out what she has done, she will justify it all. At least to herself. It has been pointed out that the longer I wait the worse it will be. She is suppose to be my best-friend. All of the friends that we share, call her a drama-queen. I don't think that she knows that. When I tell any of them about the way she has been acting, they all ask what did I expect. I expected her to be a friend and support me in my decisions for my wedding. I did not expect her to try and make it all about her. I still have not told her that we can afford to pay for her husband, mother, and grand-mother to get in, for the wedding. She (and her family) is expecting us to pay for them to get in. So now I have to decide if I am paying for my family to get or her family to get in. This is not a hard decision. I am paying for my family to get in. This is my only wedding. I want as much of my family to be there as possible. I already have two brothers that can not make it. Trevor and James are both in the Army and can't come to the wedding. I really wish that they could attend the wedding. I would like for her family to be there, but I am not going to give up my family being there for her family. I certainly am not going to ask Kelly to give up his family either. That would be crazy. I would not want him to nor would I ever ask. She has had three weddings and I am only having one. She married her husband twice, once in Jamaica and once her to make it legal. They felt it was easier that way to not have to worry about all of the paper work. I was going to have a party for them (out at faire last year) for their marriage, but Mom went into the hospital right before that. I, also, could not afford to take the time off or afford the party. Her family got upset to see me out there when I had to go pick up Elle from Betsy. They wanted to know what I was doing out there with my mom so sick. I tried to explain that Betsy was baby-sitting for me and brought Elle out there. I need to try to get some sleep.

I can not believe I am saying this, but...

I guess it is a good thing that we have so many stadiums, now. The Astrodome is now full. They are placing people in Reliant Stadium until better accommodations are found. They are talking about making room in Dallas (25,000) and San Antonio (25,000). One of my close friends (also my bridesmaid) works in the office of (one of the largest) security officer companies. Her company is helping with security of the Astrodome. I know it is hard for the people put in this horrible situation. I have been there. Everyone else, talking about it, keeps saying that the people from New Orleans should just be grateful they are alive and should stop complaining. Answer this honestly...How would you feel if you lost everything? I really mean everything. If you lost your home, car, clothes, diapers (for your baby), food, money (the banks are gone and so is your wallet with everything that proves who you are), the ring handed down from your great-great-mother, and so much more. In many cases, our fellow country-men lost family. I am trying to find different ways to help them. As for as their attitudes, they have not eaten, had water to drink, beds, AC, decent sleep, etc. For days. On top of that, they have been in fear of their lives, because of the people around them that are being violent. Anyone in those conditions are going to be grumpy. I believe that once they get showers, food & water, clean clothes, hope, and everything else they need (to feel human again) they will calm down and be more civilized. They have been fighting to survive. The people with bad intentions, the men trying to sneak into the women's showers and people who are fighting over cots and space, are being arrested. This makes it safer for the people who just want to get back on their feet and rebuild their lives. I made a list of things that they will need, you know basic needs.

Diapers
Formula
Blankets
School Supplies
Underwear (all sizes)
Panties (all sizes)
Bras (all sizes)
Clothing (all Adult and Children sizes)
Toys (infant, toddler, school-age, board games, etc.)
Food
Medical supplies
Medicines (tylenol, antacid, antihistamine, etc.)
Toothbrushes
Toothpaste
Mouth wash
Feminine supplies (pads, tampons, etc.)
Hair brushes / combs
Deodorant
Towels & wash clothes
Shampoo
Soap / body wash
there is so many basic needs